My Ride

When I was a child, I would find God between my Grandpa Douglas’ strong, rough fingertips and the silky pages of his well-used leather Bible. God showed up at Sunday school on the posters of Noah and the Ark. I’d live for snack time where we’d eat saltine crackers and sip apple juice out of little Styrofoam cups. I’d stare up at Noah and the rainbow and thank my lucky stars that I didn’t drown in that horrible flood. Then, I’d wash my dry crackers down with my juice, and resign myself to memorizing books of the Bible in hopes that my dedication to the big guy would save me from my own desolation. To me, God was (stereotypically) masculine: strong, steady, angry, and powerful. He went to war with King David and He parted the ocean for Moses and his posse. What did that mean to me? When I needed help, I’d look up into the sky and pray for God to come down and kick some ass.

I was listening to the radio at work the other day and this song came on by Jo Dee Messina, “Silver Thunderbird.” I remember listening to it when I was about 19 years old or so, when I was going to Trinity Western University. I was at a point in my life where I was trying to break the God-mold, and figure out who He was to me, personally. I remember listening to Jo Dee’s words, “if there’s a God up in heaven, He’s got a silver thunderbird” and giggling to myself, imagining God cruising around in a car like that. He’d be chilled back in his seat, his arm outstretched over the steering wheel, his wrist draped over the edge. I’d blast this song and bellow out the seemingly blasphemous lyrics at the top of my lungs, grinning in delicious rebellion.

A few years later I read a book called “The Shack” where the author portrayed God as a black woman. A lot of people in Christian circles were shocked and offended that God would be “misconstrued” like this, but personally, I lapped it up. She was empathetic and strong. Passionate and steady. Loving and angry. Gentle and powerful. If I got caught in high waters, I’d want her on my boat. And if I’m going down? It’s in a silver Thunderbird.