Hate on Headset

I'm not sure how to put this story on paper without butchering the entire scene but like with the rest of my blog entries, I will take a running leap and just dive in and hope that I don't hit cement.

I was working at Starbucks one afternoon and was unfortunately stuck at the drive-through window. When I first started working there I loathed drive-through because it was overwhelming like getting thrown into a blender with a cat. People are giving me their orders through my headset at the same time that other people are paying for their orders at the window at the same time that I am finishing their drinks and handing their orders out to them at the same time that my partners are talking to me through my headset. Cat. Blender. But I actually quite liked it once I got the hang of it because a) time went by fast and b) I like talking to people and c) time went by fast.

This one particular afternoon I was working with James. James is gay (I swear that this is applicable to my story). I was at the window and he was beside me making the drinks. This older couple pulled up to the speaker and ordered their coffees and we instantly recognized them as regulars. I also recognized them from church, so it's just one big recognize-fest when they get to the window. Hurray. Except they are known for being a little rude to us from time to time (not overly, but just enough) so we would try to get them through as quickly as possible.

James made their drinks in record-time and I noticed he hid behind the pastry case while he handed them to me. I looked quizzically at him, handed out the drinks and then after the couple was gone I asked him over my headset, "James... why were you hiding behind the pastry case?" and he replied, "because those people HATE me!" I rolled my eyes and told him that they're only nice to me because they recognize me from church. And you know what he said? As he walked away from me he pressed the talk button on his headset and said, "oh that's why! Most church people hate me..."

But he said this all so lightly while kind of laughing as if he's used to it but at the same time, he's not hardened by it as he's just not the angry type. He reacted to it all in the same way that I react to a stomach ache when I eat an entire box of chocolates for dinner. Like, oh! That's why! All nonchalant and whatever. Ha ha ha. But not funny at all. Not one bit.

James said that to me and I stood there, feet stuck, heart sunk. I was embarrassed for "the church." I was embarrassed for myself. I felt sad and disappointed and I felt frustrated because I knew, I know, something needs to change and I don't know how to make a difference by myself. I hate hate.

Hate needs to be thrown into a blender with a cat.